I think we can all agree that sometimes girls can be just plain mean. I remember in middle school and high school whenever I had a falling out with a friend or I would get beat down by something a girl said or did, my mom would remind me that I couldn’t stoop down to their level; I had to be nice, basically ‘kill’ them with kindness, and move on. She said that “mean girls” don’t end with the teenage girls, they just become mean women. And she was right. October is Anti-bullying month and I am ecstatic to partner with Teen Vogue and Secret for their Mean Stinks campaign. Mean Stinks is a place where girls come together, ditch the mean and change the conversation of girl-to-girl bullying. Over 2 million acts of nice have already been created by these incredible individuals.
There are so many types of bullying, from talking behind someone’s back to physical acts of violence and I wanted to direct my personal pledge to something I struggle with every day, and something I know so many girls AND women have trouble with, body shaming. Do you remember that scene in Mean Girls where all the girls are in Regina’s room talking about how much they hate their hips, calves, pores, shoulders, etc? We all laugh and think they’re being ridiculous but when it comes time for us to face ourselves in the mirror, where we are the most vulnerable, we do that exact same thing. For instance, I have never like my thighs, I think my legs are stubby, my stomach has never been flat and I despise profile pictures of my face because of my rounded nose; but it amazes me that as I grow older I can learn to love someone else, accept other people’s flaws, but not the ones I have made up about myself in my head. Why is that? Body shaming starts with ourselves and allowing outside factors to affect us. The world has always projected what they deem as beautiful but why is it okay for us to accept that? Each generation has a vision of what body type is ideal, what is fashionable at the time, etc. and I wanted to challenge you today to stop being so hard on yourself. You are given one body so learn to accept it, make it strong and most of all, celebrate it. I don’t think I have ever met one person who is 120% in love with their body – there is always something they wish they could improve or change. You are not alone in this fight.
Now going from there, I encourage you to stop body shaming other people. Yes, it might feel empowering for those five minutes to compare yourself to other women or talk about their appearances, but at the end of the day, what good does it do? From fat shaming to skinny shaming to even talking bad about someone’s outfit choice – it doesn’t make you better than that person, it just makes you a mean girl, and who wants that?! Today I am pledging to love my body and help others understand that every body is beautiful. Please join me in this campaign and join the Chain of Nice!
In honor of celebrating our bodies and opening the conversation about body shaming ourselves or other women, I wanted to reward one special reader on Instagram today. I will be posting my pledge picture and I want you to make your own anti-bullying pledge in the comment section. Maybe you are pledging to give someone a compliment each day, or using your words to empower others instead of tear them down. Whatever it is, I want to hear it! I am also teaming up with Circles of Change (See my previous post about it here) to give one special reader a #ChainOfNice care package. Circles of Change focuses on changing the culture and conversation surrounding health, beauty, and body image and collaborating with like-minded mission-driven organizations to support a cause. They say, let’s change “from bashing our bodies to celebrating them. From dieting and weight-loss to well-being. Let’s move from relating to our bodies as objects, to understanding them as instruments. Instruments of passion, peace, love, acceptance, creativity, power, and purpose. Our bodies are instruments of all that we encompass, our true selves.
Here is a sneak peek of some of the items in the giveaway!